Conversing like it’s 1995

Last week – I talked my husband into watching a film – Before Sunrise.  I figure any trilogy that took nearly 20 years to finish had to be worth watching.

I was sort of right.  It was a nice look at young love.  I don’t plan to watch the other two…but this isn’t about a movie review.

I found myself longing for that time – 1995.  Not because I want to be that age again, but because I missed an element of life in the mid 90s.

In the movie a young man and woman meet on a train.  He is flying back to the US the next day and convinces the young french girl to get off the train in Vienna and simply walk around the city for a 24 hours with him.   Ethan Hawke and Julie Delpy wander around the city, sit in cafes, learn about each others lives, steal wine glasses and generally have conversation that isn’t really too deep or life changing.

At one point, Julie Delpy’s character makes a comment about how no one knows she’s there….

What I loved about I?t  They had no distractions.

There were no cell phones. No checking Facebook.  No photographing food or checking in at restaurants.  No looking up ideas online of where to go, what the weather would be like, or if the cute café had a great rating on Yelp.  They talked.  They walked.  They had no expectations…

…and I tried to remember the last time I had 24 hours of time without expectation. Without filling my moments with needless information about what other people are doing with their moments.  When did I just enjoy my dinner without thinking about if I should document it for some unknown reason?

When did I start thinking that a smart use of my life was spending precious moments looking at pictures of what other people are having for dinner?

Am I so lonely that I need to fill every moment with information on what other people are doing, so much so that I miss the people I’m with?

My pact is, the next date night I get to enjoy with my husband, I don’t want to look at my phone.  Or have comedy central radio on in the car.  Or feel the need to leave an indelible social media footprint proving that our date night happened.  I just want to enjoy the moment for what it is – and share it only with the man sitting across the table from me.